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She ran away from home the next afternoon, sure that she’d find the husband of her dreams. Being young, foolish, and ill-equipped for her mission, she chose to first display a golden coin in a tavern, where she dimpled and asked for some lemonade. The barkeep suggested something more than that. She’d never had ale before and, when sweetened with honey, she found it quite tasty. In fact, once she got used to it, she could drink it as if it was lemonade.When she dragged her tired feet back home, she had neither gold, nor her maidenhead any longer. Nor did she have any memory of how she lost either.Elizabeth was furious, of course. Fully an eighth of their fortune had been squandered, lost by a stupid and willful child. She determined to ensure that the rest of their fortune was not wasted. To that end, she decided to invest it. She could make dresses. She was tired of washing other people’s clothes, and wanted to become a seamstress instead.So she concocted a plan to tell the villagers. I began to wonder if my heart rather than my cock was the weak spot in this plan. Surely I couldn’t keep this pace up night after night, after all it wasn’t like I was a 20-year-old, though I might feel like it.We made our way to my ‘boudoir’, a word they had never come across (it didn’t translate, so I used the English, or French, whichever) but which I was pleased to find became included in the normal conversation surprisingly quickly. Boudoir: a bedroom where a man may find himself capable of delivering his seed to a woman. Not actually the definition I would have used, but I suppose it does sum up what was happening. I wondered vaguely what would happen if in a thousand years time an Earth space ship arrived and found a smattering of English words in the vocabulary. Cue lots of careful analysis explaining that there is a clear convergent evolution towards some words; or maybe we’ll have met other worlds who will have explained this notion of sending ambassadors to help out when.
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